Caring for the Mental
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Caring for our mental health might seem to overlap caring for our emotional health – and you’d be right. We often ‘think’ about our emotions, and we have emotional responses to our thought processes. But when we are overloaded our thoughts can get trapped and it becomes difficult to ‘see our way out’. We can tend to ‘overthink’ things and thoughts go round and round, without any clear decision being made.
It’s worth considering how you think about the world, how you react mentally, to situations and people. Do you take time to consider before you react to someone? Or do you react, without thinking, and perhaps regret it later? I’ve definitely done that on occasions!
We live in a sea of energy. We are ALL affected to some degree by the people close to us, by the energy resonances of their thoughts. And the mass consciousness, the energy of the thoughts (and emotions) of the world, that can affect us too – if we aren’t aware of the possibility and choose to take Command of our own energies.
I came upon a statistic a while ago that made me think. A person living 150-200 years ago might not have been able to read at all, but if they could, in the whole of their life they were unlikely to read very much. A poster put up in the village square, parts from the bible, the occasional letter from friend or family, perhaps. The statistic explained that a person living then would, in their entire lifetime, not even read the number of words now included in just ONE edition of the New York Sunday Times!
Today, many people read a newspaper EVERY DAY, including the Sunday edition. And that is likely to be in addition to all the social media they may be on – Facebook, Instagram, WhatsApp, Twitter. Plus, emails, phone calls, and oh, the television, on which the News is broadcast worldwide 24 hours a day.
Take a moment to imagine the difference between the mental input for someone living that long ago, and you today. No wonder we can feel overwhelmed by it all! Two hundred years ago news about a crisis in a faraway country might have taken weeks or months to reach another country a continent away, and even then, it would not reach every household, except perhaps months later. Today we know almost instantly about anything, and that can cause us to overthink and even panic about the ‘state of the world’. But truthfully, there have always been disasters, way back to the volcano that destroyed Pompeii and before. We just haven’t known about them until well after they happened.
And take the ‘panic-demic’ created over Covid. 200 years ago it would just have been “a bad winter” and people would have moved through it, as they always did. Instead the mainstream media had people in a total panic within weeks over an illness that has a death rate no more than flu (0.1%) and actually for most people it is 0.0%. In my 6 decades of life I’ve never known society to panic about winter flu so I found the panic over covid – a similar coronavirus - bewildering. To take sensible care is one thing, but the media attitude was over the top in my humble opinion.
There is too much information! Too much coming at us. And it will keep coming, because it suits the media companies, and the social media organisations to bombard us. Only YOU can control the amount of information input you are receiving.
Taking command of what comes into my life, my head, is really important for me. To work energetically I need to be as clear and calm as I can be, and certainly not overloaded. But, isn’t that a useful state to be in whatever you do in life?
I don’t put my head in the sand, but I certainly do temper what comes in, and you can too. For instance, we only buy one newspaper a week in our household, and I might catch the TV News headlines very occasionally. I may be on social media – but I am not on every day - and I deliberately keep my Friends by and large to only those people I know in the physical world. I’m not on Instagram or, God forbid, TikTok. I keep in mind that any media outlet must serve me, rather than damaging me. I immediately Block anyone who attacks me on social media or causes me stress in any way. Social media should be for sharing, not bullying.
So, how can you begin to care for your mental health?
The SITTING STILL AND QUIET exercises from earlier blogs works excellently here. As well as resting the body and calming the emotions, it allows the mind to slow down, giving it time to process and ‘catch up with itself’. Being still and quiet, even for a few minutes each day, is something we do so rarely in the modern world, but it has many advantages.
MEDITATION has moved from being thought of as elite - or bonkers - and is now much more widely used and understood. Moving the brain waves into a calmer state – meditation - is known to have many benefits. Medical evidence shows it is physically good for us, but it is also good for our mental (and emotional) health. One form of meditation – mindfulness - is recommended by NICE (National Institute for Clinical Excellence) for the prevention of relapse in depression, although I would suggest that all meditation is helpful for our mental health.
In China meditation is often called, ‘sitting still, doing nothing’. One Taoist Sage referred to it as ‘mental fasting’, and it was said to be as important to the mind as occasional physical fasting for the body.
If you haven’t tried meditation before, going it alone can be a bit daunting. Guided meditations on CD are a very easy way to start. Some good guided meditations come from my Energy Field Healing teacher and can be found at www.joaslight.com. I also have some great short meditations available on my phone from the Buddhify app and there are many more apps and CDs available. What’s important is to find a voice that you like listening to!
MANAGING your EXPECTATIONS is very helpful for mental calmness and coping. If we are clear and honest about what we are likely to experience from a job, situation, or a relationship we will not expend hours of thinking and struggling, trying to work out why we can’t change things, or why it wasn’t as good as we hoped. It has been said that the gap between expectation and reality is where disappointment lies. The bigger the gap ….
BEING AWARE of your thoughts is a good first step to caring for your mental energies. Do you waste energy going over and over things? Would it help to make lists, so you don’t have to hold it all in your head? Do you take a minute each morning to consider your day and what you hope to achieve and how? That small step can be very clearing for the mind – yes, I’m going to tackle that first, and then hopefully go there, etc. Always allowing for the ‘flow’ of the day to guide you or alter things, because being too ‘rigid’ in our thought processes can also cause us to feel stressed.
TAKE YOUR TIME – this is something I say to my students. When I learned to type in my Medical Secretarial training that was the rule. Accuracy first, speed follows naturally. Unless you are in an absolute crisis situation, there is always another minute, or three. Slowing down a little helps the brain to keep up, helping to prevent errors and accidents.
“I find I go faster by going slower” – Gil Grissom, CSI series
“We do without ‘Doing’, and it all gets done.” – my astrology teacher taught me this – though it may have been said originally by someone else. I have leaned on these words many times, reminding myself that I don’t have to rush, rush, rush, Do, Do, Do. By going quietly and calmly from chore to chore, and pausing to take a breath or sit for a couple of minutes between chores, everything gets done; the urgent stuff naturally shows itself and rises to the top of the list, and what doesn’t get done that day, will be fine to complete another day.
SEEK PROFESSIONAL HELP. This is something very much in the media at the moment - that it is OK to seek help if we are so stressed that our mental processes are becoming unbearable. And it certainly is OK. In fact, it can be vital. You could choose something as simple as taking time to have a regular calming massage, or you might try Energy Field Healing, which can clear out a lot of excess mental energy and old stuck issues, or Reiki, which can be very calming. Or any other therapy you feel could help.
Or, there may be a time in your life when you need a talking therapy – some kind of counselling or psychotherapy. I took this deliberate step when my Mum was declared terminally ill. Mum was a wonderful matriarchal figure in our large family, and I knew, as sure as eggs are eggs, that I would need help to go through the awful, long process of losing her and coping with whatever might happen in the family – and it happened! I chose Transactional Analysis as the psychotherapy model because I felt it would be the most helpful, and so it turned out. Even now, years after Mum’s death, I am still thankful for the support and the learning I gained through the months of therapy, the coping strategies I learned which are still useful in everyday life. Yes, there was a cost, as I did this privately, but it was worth its weight in gold.
When it seems appropriate, I am open about sharing this with clients and students, and I see their eyes open a little wider, as if they wonder whether I am ok, or a little bit ‘mad’, because I had ‘psychotherapy’. I’m not mad, but I might have been without that support and understanding at a very difficult time in life.
One or two people have intimated that it was ‘weak’ to seek such help. I think in fact it is the opposite. It takes strength to decide, ‘I need help here’. If a pipe breaks and water pours through the ceiling, you call a plumber. You would not dream of trying to fix it yourself, as the house flooded around you. If your thoughts have become totally overwhelmed by past or current issues, you may not be in a place to help yourself. Sometimes it is sensible to seek outside help of some kind.
You may have gathered I love quotes. Other people can say things so beautifully and succinctly. Here are a couple to finish with that have helped me care for my mental health over the years:
“If a man does not keep pace with his companions perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured or far away.”
Henry David Thoreau
“The man who crosses the line first is always alone.”
"The early bird gets the worm – but the second mouse gets the cheese!”
DISCLAIMER (The Small Print)
These are just my current thoughts.
Thoughts can change as we learn and grow.
I can be wrong, but am nevertheless entitled to my thoughts.
You don’t have to read my blog or take any notice of anything I say.
It is important you always make up your own mind - about everything.
I am not you, and don’t know you or the details of your life.
Therefore, you are responsible for any decisions or changes you make as a result of reading
my thoughts.
Finally, nothing in any of my blogs is intended nor should be taken as medical or health advice. Always research for yourself and talk to doctors or therapists you trust (conventional or complementary).